The Fat Cow Complex :: essays research papers

Its mid-June. I graduated a few days earlier and hither I am sitting nervously on a bench outside Lane Bryant, staring at the gate Its my first dividing line interview ever. Im nervous as hell. I must have dried my hands fifty times on my dress notwithstanding theyre still sticky with sweat. A woman comes to the front and opens the gate. She asks my name, I tell her. She nods, smiles, shakes my hand, introduces herself as Fran and tells me how cute I look. I beam and thank her. Im not used to compliments. One of the questions she asks me is what my best shopping experience was like. I rack my brain. What kind of question is that? I think. Taking a fertile breath I reply that it would have to be the first time I ever shopped there, at Lane Bryant. She looks at me skeptically. I explain how my mum guided me there after a long discouraging day of school clothes shopping. To pacify her, I follow and try on jeans and a t-shirt. I leave the dressing room to model for Mom and the sales lady squeals over how good I look. Im taken aback. somewhere in the back of my mind I know that she does this to make the sale but its the first time Ive ever been complimented by a salesperson. I feel welcome here. I dont get the You? You think youll be able to buy anything here? look. By the end of my history Im nearly in tears. I smile sheepishly. I get the job. As I leave, Tess, another woman who works at the store, tells me I look great. I do. I am beautiful.Early July. Mel invites twenty of her closest friends to swim in her pool after a barbecue at the beach. Im standing on the deck, beach towel wrapped around me. Everyone else is in the pool. Im trying to think of the least conspicuous expression to slip into the warm inviting pool. Amanda notices Im just standing there and calls for me to join them, also calling everyones attention to me. I swallow the huge clunk in my throat, throw my towel over the rail and jump in the water, praying no one saw the jiggling of my thig hs as I leapt. Later theyre having icteric fights and Im floating alone in the deep end.